Organic Batter Blaster

I was at the grocery store today, dutifully bypassing all the delicious food and filling my cart with broccoli, veggie burgers, and low fat cheese, when I encountered a stumbling block.  Now mind you, I had successfully navigated the gourmet cheeses, the bakery, the cookies and crackers aisle, and even glimpsed the chip aisle, but I was not prepared for what awaited me in the organic dairy section.  I was reaching for a carton of Egg Beaters when suddenly I saw...this:

Organic Batter Blaster.  Multipurpose pancake/waffle batter in a can.  You read that right.  It's the Reddi-Wip of pancakes.  And it's organic.

Now, when I saw the Organic Batter Blaster perched one shelf above the Egg Beaters, two things crossed my mind.  First, I cursed my rekindled commitment to healthy living, which precluded purchasing items like Organic Batter Blaster.  Second, I wondered why no one had told me about this product before said commitment was rekindled.

I tossed two cartons of Egg Beaters into my cart and moved on, now feeling somewhat deprived and out of sorts.

When I got home, I Googled Organic Batter Blaster.  As evidenced by several enthusiastic reviews, Organic Batter Blaster has made some very lazy people very happy.  If I'm being honest, I hope to one day be one of those people.  But not today.

Weight today: 288 lbs.